I never saw a Purple Cow,
I never hope to see one;
But I can tell you, anyhow,
I'd rather see than be one.
Gelett Burgess

I finally saw a purple cow.
I'd never hoped to see one
Nor dreamed that I'd be writing now
To tell you that to be one

Is not so fun. I know because
On seeing, I became
A purple cow! And nothing was
Ever again the same.

The boys all laughed, the mean girls sneered,
And grownups shrieked in fright.
I asked an old friend what they feared.
He said, The very sight

Of you! So, with a can of paint,
I sprayed my skin all green.
Thus ended everyone's complaint,
The world turned not-so-mean.

I've noticed how the world is full
of folks who will allow
and accept almost any bull
but not so much a cow.

While underneath, I know that I
Am really purple still,
I keep it to myself—and sigh,
As certain poets will.

by James B. Nicola

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James B. Nicola's poetry has garnered two Willow Review awards, a Dana Literary award, and six Pushcart nominations—including one from Parody! His full-length collections are Manhattan Plaza, Stage to Page, Wind in the Cave, Out of Nothing, and Quickening: Poems from Before and Beyond. His nonfiction book, Playing the Audience, won a Choice award.